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  • Writer's pictureVicki Viall

Build a Positive Life and Career

Part 1: Lose the Negativity!

We've all known them. Perhaps we have been, or are them ourselves.

Negative Nellies. Energy Vampires. Debbie Downers. Woe-is-me-ers. I can't do it. I can't go. I can't, I can't, I can't!

They are in or around us all the time and they can truly affect our feelings and our energy levels. IF we allow it.

Whether it's in the home, school, work, the gym, the playground, or wherever they are there. Just waiting. But, it's not THEIR choice on how or if they will influence us. That is OUR choice, and our's alone.

We can stay put and try to survive them, or just maybe, we can influence them. But experience says that is unlikely. They don't want to change. So, any effort spent on trying is time that could have been spent productively doing something else.

What we can do is walk away. Don't ever - EVER - let them tear you down to their level. They will try. Oh, how they will try!

We often find our work environments poisoned by it as well. It could be our customers (if you have ever done collections, you know what I mean!), our co-workers, or our leaders. We might even have, at one time, been our own worst enemies with our own negativity.

No matter how much we love our jobs, or our home environment, being around them will completely drain us. Not just mentally, but emotionally and physically as well.

Getting away from it can be such a relief! That should be our "Aha!" moment. The moment we realize we have a choice to make. Are we going to put up with one more put down? Are we going to listen to another litany of "I can't", or are we going to limp through another day because we are too drained to get through any other way?

As one who grew up in an abusive home, it took a ton of concentrated effort to even begin to reprogram my brain to think positively and actually start looking for the positive around me.

It didn't happen overnight. In fact, years later, I am still a work in progress. I want to emphasize that word PROGRESS. Sometimes, we make forward progress, but others, it's more like regression.

Energy zappers have always been around us, and always will be. We will have setbacks in our own thinking, we will encounter new negative influences or environments.

And, it's an ongoing exercise in picking ourselves up. Not just picking ourselves up, either, but then putting one foot in front of the other and moving forward again. Please don't ever stop getting up. Your life may, literally, depend on it!

The world will try to convince us that "cutting the cord," walking away, or "cleaning house" is a rude or cruel thing. I ask for whom?!

When your entire life is suffering, do you owe it to those intent on tearing you down or apart, the opportunity to stay and then let them beat you up some more? No!

Just NO!

Did you know this behavior is abuse? Oh yes, no matter how it is presented, it's abuse. It's bullying on a different level.

And, it is now being confirmed that this can cause PTSD in the victim(s).

It's YOUR life. Do you want to have a happy, fulfilling life? Career? Family?

Then pull yourself up. Learn to say, "I can!" And, then do it!

Anything and everything stated above can apply to personal life or work life. And, from there, it can affect everyone and everything around us. Think about that.

It's just like throwing a stone in a pond and then watching the ripples growing larger and spreading out farther.

Do you get it? Is it time for changes? If so, you can do it! You DESERVE to give yourself that gift. No, you OWE it to yourself.

If you feel you cannot do this alone, reach out. Or up.

There is always someone to talk with. You can even reach out to us! At any time.

Just find positive, supportive, encouraging people and places to fill the empty space now available in your heart and life.

Grow into the beautiful butterfly you were created to be. It is YOUR time to fly high, dear one.

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